On searching for perfection

 Perfectionism, as I see it, is a desire to polish any given product or result of one's work, especially of a creative kind, ad infinitum. While the product may indeed by rendered near-perfect thanks to such an extended, tireless process of improvement, there will be bouts of frustration and emotional strain along the way. 

The inability to accept imperfection in thing reflects insecurity about the self and fear of inadequacy. For a perfectionist, the product of her work is commensurate with herself. She fuses herself with the outcome of her creative process to the point that if it does not live up to her expectations and arbitrarily imposed standards, she feels like a failure herself.

Despite the emotional burden that perfectionism represents, letting go is not really an option, for perfectionism is often part of one's make-up, a second nature or an element of identity. Perfectionists may secretly pride themselves on their meticulousness, hard work ethos and attention to detail and see non-perfectionists as sloppy and careless. At the same time, they are likely to forgive the latter drawbacks in others but never in themselves. In doing so, they follow a twisted logic: as burdensome as perfectionism is, it cannot be "shed" - some just need to do things right. 

Perfectionism is a disease of the soul; it poisons mood and weighs upon the spirit. A perfectionist will never do much as endless polishing takes time and depletes energy. It also annihilates joy and turns the creative process into drudgery. Perfectionism goes hand in hand with negativity since the desire for perfection stems from a persistent sense that one's work is still not good enough. 

Will it ever be, though?